Anyone else having trouble finding where they packed their Christmas spirit? I could have sworn I put it in the box next to the stockings!! I'm kinda feeling Charlie Brownish over here. I've lost the true meaning of Christmas somewhere along the way.
It's been a tense couple of weeks, with not knowing if Mr. Awesome© will work the week between Christmas and New Years. Our dilemma is that he's only a contract employee which means no benefits and no vacation or holiday pay. If the plant shuts down, he doesn't get paid and while we have a little in savings the cost of Christmas has eaten into it a little and making that ever important mortgage payment needs to be a priority. Thankfully, he was told they were going to work at least a couple of days that week.
I've also been wrestling with our lack of a home church. Littlest Oompa has been asking every Sunday to go to church and I feel awful that we haven't gone. The church we love is such a long drive, about 50 miles away. Neither of our two cars is all that reliable and dumping 100 extra miles on them each week was rough on the cars and our wallets for gas. I've "shopped around" a few other churches but haven't quite found the right fit. We are Charismatic Christians and want to find a church with a Holy Spirit invoking praise and worship team, a pastor who teaches and makes you think and a congregation that is open and welcoming. Throw in an active youth group and I'll be on cloud nine.
I think what this icky feeling really boils down to is that I need to feel connected, in some small way to making the next few weeks a little better for someone...anyone. I feel this overwhelming need to do something, but I don't know what. I read a blog post by a woman who made soup and bread to pass out from her car to the homeless. I've read stories about individuals and groups taking up collections of food to give to families in need. I guess, I want to find a family who is in the same position we were in last year and give them a glimmer of hope. Hope. I know I can't fix what ails them but hope is what got us through last winter and hope is something I can give.
Now I just need to figure out how.....Deborah