I am a child of the 80's and 90's. I grew up witnessing a lot of firsts involving women. I don't remember a time when woman couldn't do everything or weren't encouraged to break all walls in pursuit of our dreams. Let no boundary, man or corporate policy get in the way of us achieving our goals. Being a woman didn't mean you stayed at home and took care of your kids, you slap 'em in daycare and go after that CEO position. Kids, house, husband and killer job...you will have it all...now go get it!! You are WOMAN...RAWR!!
There is this pressure from society to be that stiletto wearing, child juggling, corporate ladder climbing, she-woman. Or in my case; apron wearing, child juggling, food show hopping, she-woman!! At the end of the day, I find myself asking...is it worth it? What am I sacrificing, who is being short-changed in this deal and is it the right thing? Things that make you go, hmmm?
noun - the act of or need for making up one's mind.
I have been teetering on the fence about a major life change for the past 6 months. Please keep in mind that when I say major life change I mean for me. For my family. In the context of your life it might not seem like such a big whoop-de-do...but it impacts us in a big way. Just wanted to get that disclaimer out there...public service is a concern of mine!
Where was I?? Oh yeah...I'm abdicating my job. I kinda like that...makes it sound better than, "quitting my job." I've been back and forth with this decision and really just need to do it. Problem is that I'm a people pleaser. I like to make people happy, often to my own detriment. I'm working on it!! I've just realized that the meager yet helpful income it affords isn't enough to offset the burden it carries. Erratic hours, non-stop phone calls and text messages, topped off with silly office politics. Not my scene, man.
I enjoy the creativity of the menu planning and cooking and after the initial self-doubting, I really did love planning the festivals and banquet dinners. However, there just aren't enough hours in the day and enough energy in my body to continue to attempt to do it all. I'm ashamed to admit that I let littlest Oompa down last year in regards to his school work. My house fell apart, my sanity took a nose dive, our budget was shot, our diet was laced with a ton more nasty processed foods, kids were left to their own devices more than I would have liked, and I was unhappy.....very unhappy. We've all heard the saying, "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." It's the right thing.
Hanging up my Super Woman cape.......Deborah